Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
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