oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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