exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Randomize