If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
