ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
