He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
