I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize