i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
