I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
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