I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
