I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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