Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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