HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
