Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
