You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
