But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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