thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
