I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
