i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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