what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
