Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
