i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
