hotel room ftw
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
