i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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