Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
My room smells like vodka and shame
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
