Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize