3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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