grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
