Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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