that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize