Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
