How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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