I'm really into asian looking animals
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
