Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
