Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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