1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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