please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
