In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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