And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
party gras won. party gras always wins.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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