I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Randomize
