Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
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