she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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