Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
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