Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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