Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
dude i'm inner monologue high
you win again, gameday.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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