PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
