Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Randomize
