i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I just forgot I was standing up.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
