The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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