There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
